We have all been gathered in this time and space to experience and experiment as we please. What is this? Those are questions I cannot answer.
I had an experience that changed my life. What was this experience? I have no idea, but it’s there, it’s still there as I’m typing this. I woke up one day and I felt it within myself, I felt it in my eyes as I’m observing my reality, and I mistakenly thought of it as my downfall.
I’ve noticed immediately that I see the world in an entirely different view.
Life felt heavy, I had this sinking feeling in my gut, I had become out of sync with my own being. I would wake up and feel that something wasn’t right. I could not explain what this was, but I knew, I just knew it was there.
It was holding me back, so I thought, but in reality I was holding myself back. I thought it was causing me self hatred and depression. But it was me. It was me who was causing this within myself.
I truly realized tonight, Monday, October 29, 2012, 11:36 PM,
I need to let go of expectations, I need to live in the moment, I need to find joy in whatever I have created, I need to accept myself and others as we all learn, grow, and experience life together.
Whichever name I give to this, does not matter.
The only thing I need to be aware of is that I’m a part of life, of existence, of an essence that is.
I will to tap into this river and move along with it’s flow.
- Michael Otwell
(This is a personal issue I’ve been dealing with, so this is more for documentation reasons, so I can always look back and always remember that I can truly change how this is effecting me.)